Do you ever get that urge to shoot someone in the head with something high calibre, just to see their head explode? How about finding something really cute, and then stabbing it in the face? Or burning something really valuble, watching it go up in ashes. How about telling someone how you really feel, just to see how things will turn out? Strange, what we humans will do for love...I mean, I'd do the last thing up above, but I'd never do the first three. But they're all just as potentially self-destructive.
I keep telling myself that I should stop caring about girls, that none of it matters, that nothing'll happen anyway. But then there's this part of me that notices, that cares, what wants, that desires, that needs, that yearns for what it cannot have. And so every time that girl logs on, my heart skips a beat, my emotions spasm, and I fall over myself (electronically) to go talk to her.
We are human because we love. But love can dehumanise us. Why, then, should I subject myself to the whims of the Fates, when I can end things so much simpler?
Because I am human, there exists no other path. I cannot transcend my Earthly presence. And so, for here unto eternity, I am doomed to cherish but to never have, love but to never hold. The blessing of Life, but the the curse of Love.
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5 weeks ago
1 comment:
usually i don't like to read blogs.. but for some reason i decided to check out xc's n then saw jennifer's then urs.
after i read this (though it was posted ages ago) i just thought to myself...wow it's not just me. That is exactly how i feel sometimes.. the um first paragraph that is.
It's good to know i'm not totally insane =]
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